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For some this is true: Don't drink the water you'll get pregnant! For a growing number the ability to fall pregnant is a long and ardious process with many roller coaster rides of emotions and pregnancy test kits. The angst felt by woman who see their friends/relatives/work mates fall pregnant within a drop of a hat is indescribable. They keep saying to themselves: 'When will it be my turn?'

Just because you haven't conceived doesn't mean you cant or wont be able to fall pregnant naturally- sure there are some medical reasons that might inhibit it but one thing is for certain you need to put your body in the best healthy state possible.

Did you know: 

~Around four per cent of all children born in Australia are the result of IVF -- that's the equivalent one child in every average sized classroom.

~The success rates of IVF significantly drops from 35 per cent in patients under 30 years old to just eight per cent for women over 40 years of age.

~A quarter of Australian women undergoing IVF are over the age of 40.

This leaves many to ask how can I place my body in the best possible space to fall pregnant?

We have compiled some tips, foods and ideas to help you on your way:

1. Healthy weight

Being overweight or underweight can affect your chances of conceiving. Too much or too little body fat can make you have irregular periods or stop them completely, which can affect your ability to conceive.

+Your weight is healthy if your body mass index is between 20 and 25.

+Women whose BMI is more than 30 or under 19 may have problems conceiving.

+If your partner's BMI is more than 30, his fertility is likely to be lower than normal.

     2. Exercise

Studies of the effects of exercise on fertility have found that vigorous exercise reduces the risk of ovulation problems and that moderate exercise decreases the risk of miscarriage and increases the chance of having a baby among women who undergo ART(Assisted Reproductive Technology.

Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) is a complex condition which is associated with infertility. Women with PCOS often have irregular or no periods because they rarely ovulate. For overweight and obese women with PCOS regular exercise can increase the frequency of ovulation which leads to more regular menstrual cycles. As ovulation becomes more frequent, the chance of conceiving increases. While studies show that exercise boosts female fertility it is important to note that a large amount of very high intensity exercise may actually reduce fertility and the chance of having a baby with ART. So, it’s a good idea to avoid very high intensity exercise while trying for a baby.

There is also a link between smoking and poorer quality sperm, although the effect on male fertility isn't certain. But stopping smoking will improve your partner's general health.

There's no clear evidence of a link between caffeine, which is found in drinks such as coffee, tea and cola, and fertility problems. Though it is recommended to keep the caffeine at a lower level. There is also some prescription drugs and illicit substances that will interfere with the ability to fall pregnant.

     4. Food

+Following a low-carb diet may improve hormone levels associated with fertility, especially among women with PCOS.

+To boost fertility levels, avoid foods high in trans fats. Eat foods rich in healthy fats instead, such as extra virgin olive oil.

+Some studies suggest that eating more calories at breakfast and less at your evening meal can improve fertility.

+Taking an antioxidant supplement or eating antioxidant-rich foods can improve fertility rates, especially among men with infertility.

+Eating a diet high in refined carbs can raise insulin levels, which may increase the risk of infertility and make it harder to get pregnant.

+Eating more protein from vegetable sources, instead of animal sources, may improve fertility levels in women.

+Replacing low-fat dairy products with high-fat versions may help improve fertility and increase your chances of getting pregnant.

+Consuming iron supplements and non-heme iron from plant-based food sources may decrease the risk of ovulatory infertility.

    5. Relax

The last piece of the puzzle that we are sharing is the impact that the stress or worry will have on conception. We know of several examples of woman who were so stressed/anxious/uptight about the whole process and when they gave up and stopped trying so hard- guess what they FELL PREGNANT!

As your stress levels increase, your chances of getting pregnant decrease. This is likely due to the hormonal changes that occur when you feel stressed. Having a stressful job and working long hours can also increase the time it takes you to become pregnant.

In fact, stress, anxiety and depression affect around 30% of women who attend fertility clinics.

Receiving support and counselling may reduce anxiety and depression levels, therefore increasing your chances of becoming pregnant.

Our next article on fertility is going to be on the small percent of woman who conceive fine in the first pregnancy and then struggle with their second (second infertility). This actually accounts for a whopping 50% of infertility cases.

The above information has been collated from a range of sources and research papers.

The sense of smell is very important. Did you know that this sense often gets affected due to depression? Many observe during pregnancy that their sense of smell heightens often making nausea worse so why is it that many suffer a loss of smell in the postanatal stage due to postnatal depression or other mental illness post baby?

"Personally, my husband did not believe me that my sense of smell had gotten so bad due to my postnatal depression and anxiety. Unfortunately now many smells go unnoticed or the degree of the smell needs to be greater in order to sense it..."

So here is why?

Depression, schizophrenia and seasonal affective disorder all suppress the sense of smell. The olfactory bulbs is the part of the brain that gives us our sense of smell. Researchers have found that the more severely depressed a person was, the smaller their olfactory bulb.  Therefore this suggests that depression may cloud, but not damage, a person's sense of smell. The reduced brain response to odours found in depressed persons may be tied to problems in two closely connected parts of the brain that play an important role in processing emotional information and smell, known as the orbitofrontal cortex and amygdala.

The effects were present whether or not an individual was taking antidepressant drugs.

It has also been noted that once the depression has been successfully treated the sense of smell/response to smells returned back to their normal levels.

As we head into the New Year of school, work and general Mum life balance we need to take count of our mindset. When we have a negative mindset we will notice that everything is a struggle and everything is just so much harder.

It is easy to set goals or New Years resolutions but it is so much harder to enact change. If we go into the year with half hearted thoughts and we are not truely feeling the vibe then the rest will become history and we will find ourselves back in the same situation. With goals or resolutions you also have to attach a belief and positivity. If you go into a situation with a negative attitude do you think the outcome will be positive or negative?

No mother can be positive all the time- we all have a daily moments as we are sleep deprived, running off the kids leftovers and spend the day serving other people's needs but it is important to turn the thinking around...

Let me put this to you:

Sharon wants to become more active and as a result wants to up her walks to 4 mornings a week. Sharon says "oh i will start in two weeks time as I am so tired"..."I dont think I can get up 4 times a week"

Already Sharon, without even knowing about it, has put road blocks in the way- and has pushed her goals/resolutions off the plate..Do you think Sharon will achieve her goals/resolutions??

If you really want to change your outlook on life and achieve the 2020 goals or resolutions, try using these top 10 techniques (which we chose) to change how you deal with problems and see the world:

1. Realize that your thoughts do not own you. Stop your negative thoughts in their tracks by realizing that you’re in charge of what you think, not the other way around.
2. Take time to figure out what you really want. When you feel yourself feeling negative about things that you haven’t accomplished, take time to think if you really want those things. Finding out what is really important to you can help eliminate bad feelings over things that you don’t truly want.
3. Accept the good things. Sometimes we get so caught up in the bad stuff coming our way that we forget to appreciate the good things. Take a minute to sit down and think of all the positive things that happened in your day, no matter how small.
4. Get excited about all the possibilities that lay ahead. Even in the midst of the biggest disasters there are a multitude of possibilities that await you to make changes or take on the world tomorrow.
5. Believe the world is a good place. If you look at the world and only seem doom and gloom laid out in front of you you’re not doing yourself any favours. Believe the world is a good place and you’re likely to find many more ways good things can come your way.
6. Stop making excuses. There are always a million excuses for any person not to do something even if that something can make them feel happier. Stop putting up obstacles to your happiness and ditch those lame excuses when you hear yourself making them.
7. Don’t play the victim. Bad things happen to everyone from time to time. Pitying yourself and wanting others to feel sorry for you isn’t going to make things better. Pick yourself up and start working towards a happier future.
8. Don’t place your future in someone else’s hands. Your future is yours alone to shape. Remember this and take control of where your're going in life.
9. Create realistic goals. Of course you’re going to feel frustrated if you make your goals so unattainable that you can’t reach them no matter how hard you work. Create smaller or more realistic goals so you can feel accomplished instead of defeated each day.
10. Decide why you want what you want. If you’re feeling upset because you feel like you aren’t achieving the things you want in life, take a moment to sit back and figure out the reasons you actually want those things. You may find you’re not as attached to them as you think.

Remember anything is possible you just have to REALLY WANT IT and go with THE RIGHT ATTITUDE.

Mindfulness is a process that leads to a mental state characterized by nonjudgmental awareness of the present experiences, such as sensations, thoughts, bodily states, and the environment. It enables us to distance ourselves from our thoughts and feelings without labeling them as good or bad.

Anxiety is the mind and body's reaction to stressful, dangerous, or unfamiliar situations. It's the sense of uneasiness, distress, or dread you feel before a significant event. A certain level of anxiety helps us stay alert and aware, but for those suffering from an anxiety disorder, it feels far from normal - it can be completely debilitating.

An anxious person will report an unreasonable exaggeration of threats, repetitive negative thinking, hyper-arousal, and a strong identification with fear. The fight-or-flight response kicks into overdrive.

By focusing our attention on the present moment, mindfulness counteracts rumination and worrying. Worrying about the future (e.g. I better remember to pay those bills and clean my house this weekend) and ruminating about the past (e.g., I should have done this rather than that) are generally maladaptive thinking processes. Mindfulness can be an important tool for helping us to better focus on the present moment.

Mindfulness helps us reduce anxiety and depression. Mindfulness teaches us how to respond to stress with awareness of what is happening in the present moment, rather than simply acting instinctively, unaware of what emotions or motives may be driving that decision. By teaching awareness for one's physical and mental state in the moment, mindfulness allows for more adaptive reactions to difficult situations.

Beyond Blue states:

“The research tells us that practising mindfulness does have some benefits for mental health wellbeing and for managing depression and anxiety. It is also helpful when it comes to managing some long-term physical conditions, helping the patient to better deal with pain or discomfort.

Many people who practise mindfulness report a number of tangible benefits, such as:

• Improved memory
• Better concentration
• More flexibility in their thinking
• Greater ability to focus
• Less rumination (when the mind gets over chatty!)
• Better stress management
• Higher satisfaction with relationships and quality of life

 There has also been some research conducted linking the benefits of turmeric supplements by influencing the neurotransmitter balance in the brain and can be complimentary treatment.

Mindfulness. Being present in the immediate. Slowing thoughts, breath and body to feel into all that is right now. This blissful, calm state is one that we’d all love in our classrooms a little more often, right? Incorporating mindfulness activities into your daily routine. Itis one way to incite this kind of calm.

Really read story time – unlike a sitting meditation, mindfulness can be done whilst you are doing anything, it’s just about being totally focussed on the task at hand. Reading the bedtime story is a great one. So many of us are reading the story on autopilot with our minds in our inbox, or planning dinner. Next time you read The Gruffalo, try totally focussing on the words, the images, the story. You might even get into it.

Don’t forget the endless benefits of mindfulness for Mums. Mindfulness training can help reduce symptoms of postpartum depression. According to Gannon, meditation can also help new mothers navigate feelings of uncertainty, cope with the stress of parenting, and even increase lactogenesis (a fancy word for “produce milk”) in mothers who are breastfeeding.

So why not stop and READ a book to your kids tonight!

Hugging meditation, made famous by Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh, is rooted in the belief that a good hug can have transformative effects. 

Thich Nhah Hanh is a Vietnamese Buddhist monk, teacher, author, poet and peace activist who now lives in France. His graceful and simple way of conveying his teachings has helped made Buddhism and meditation appealing throughout the world. 

"When we hug, our hearts connect and we know that we are not separate beings," Hanh writes. "Hugging with mindfulness and concentration can bring reconciliation, healing, understanding, and much happiness."

How the to do the ‘three hug’ practice:

1. Begin by recognizing the other person.

Start by bowing toward the other person as a way of acknowledging their presence. Then bring yourself fully into the moment by taking three conscious breaths.

2. Go in for the hug (and keep your breathing in mind).

A quick pat on the back won’t really do the trick here. Instead, hold the other person in your arms for three deep breaths. Hanh writes that the first breath should be devoted to you honoring your presence in the moment. The second should honor the other person, while the final breath should be focused on feeling happy and grateful for your togetherness.

3. End with gratitude.

After you release each other, finish the experience by bowing again to express thankfulness for the other person.

According to the practice, you have to really hug the person you are holding. You have to make him or her very real in your arms, not just for the sake of appearances, patting him on the back to pretend you are there, but breathing consciously and hugging with all your body, spirit, and heart. Hugging meditation is a practice of mindfulness. “Breathing in, I know my dear one is in my arms, alive. Breathing out, she is so precious to me.” If you breathe deeply like that, holding the person you love, the energy of your care and appreciation will penetrate into that person and she will be nourished and bloom like a flower.

“When we are mindful, deeply in touch with the present moment, our understanding of what is going on deepens, and we begin to be filled with acceptance, joy, peace and love.”

— Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh

We have previously shared the benefits of mindfulness in motherhood and why it can be helpful to anyone. Each post shares a different strategy to use to bring you in to the present to calm your thoughts and engage you conscious being.

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.

This captures the essence of mindfulness: bringing our attention to the present moment – the only moment we can ever be sure of.

Plus, at least one study has shown that mindfulness training can help reduce symptoms of postpartum depression. According to Gannon, meditation can also help new mothers navigate feelings of uncertainty, cope with the stress of parenting, and even increase lactogenesis (a fancy word for “produce milk”) in mothers who are breastfeeding.

Both mindfulness and nature help bring a sense of calm to you when you need it most.

“Nature meditation can help you cultivate a loving connection with yourself, the earth, and the entire web of life,” according to Buddhist meditation teacher Mark Coleman of Awake in the Wild. Through techniques like sights, sounds, and stories, we can help our children harness the calming aspects of nature during bedtime, dinnertime, car rides, and other moments throughout their day.

The best part is that nature meditation does not always have to be performed outdoors; from visualizations to nature sound apps, there are so many ways to experience mindfulness using nature even from inside the comfort of your home.

A simple activity combines meditation, breathing techniques and paying attention to the present moment to help you notice the way you think, feel and act.- though it has so many benefits.

Walking through nature with the family can get you all to explore the beauty of nature. Your could collect and examine autumn leaves, or feel the sand beneath the toes during a walk on the beach- really taking note of the trees shape, type, size etc forces your brain to stop and be present rather than drifting off into 1000 thoughts. After taking the walk and truly being present with the energy in nature brings you back lighter/freer and less anxious/stressed.

3 other ideas from soul and spirit magazine:

Find your ‘nature sit spot’

Find a quiet spot where you won’t be disturbed for 20-30 minutes. Remain still. What can you see in front of you? What can you see in your peripheral vision? What can you hear? What can you feel on your skin? What can you smell? Bring your awareness to each of your senses in turn. What do you notice over 20-30 minutes? How did things change? Come back and repeat the exercise at different times, on different days, at different times of year. Did you notice any changes? Any regular animals visiting?

Just breathe

Bring your attention to your breathing. Where do you feel the air coming in and out of your body? Rest your awareness there. Is your mind wandering? Just kindly bring it back to your breathing. Remind yourself that trees release the oxygen we inhale and absorb the carbon dioxide we exhale. As we breathe, we are borrowing air before returning it to nature.

Touch the earth

Stand, sit or lie in your garden, in a forest, in the park, by the sea or up a mountain. Bring your awareness to the parts of your body which are in contact with the ground. What do they feel like? Can you feel the ground supporting you? How does it make you feel?

After the oxytocin wears off….

Let’s be real for a second. Let’s stop and reflect on what you’ve done. YOU GREW A HUMAN! So to me, you are in fact a Superhero! Whether you home or hospital birthed, whether your baby came out through the sunroof or not, whether you breast or bottle feed, your baby is here and earthside because of you. When was the last time you gave yourself a pat on the back for that?

From the shitty nappies and vomiting, to PND and sleep schools, to bizarre mothers groups and unsolicited parenting advice, mothering is a right of passage that stretches not just your belly but your soul to grow.

The oxytocin wears off, the delivery of home made meals and new baby gifts stop. You’re neck deep in forever washing and sleepless nights and right there perhaps some doubt about your life direction comes up. You stare in the mirror potentially at this new body you judge and loathe, resenting the biological privilege that just railroaded life as you knew it. And that’s the moment, right there where you can catch yourself, and the negative self talk. Where you connect and redirect with you again (just like you will with your toddler in the years to come, thanks Dr Dan Siegel!) because this is where it gets better.

Yes your pelvic floor will recover, yes they will in fact one day sleep through the night. Yes you will enjoy sex again, wear white, and even another babe if you choose to do so. You’ll be stronger, fitter, wiser and more full of love than ever before.

As a Mother you are the embodiment of grace under pressure. Alongside congratulating yourself for carrying and delivering your babe, celebrate the fact that you are keeping your babe alive! You’ve acquired new skills like being able to pick things up off the floor with the big toe hook and flick method and you now have this quiet understanding of women in a new way that you may not have experienced before.

This babe of yours took time to grow and it takes time for the body to recover and that’s ok. Thank your body. Be kind to her. Love her and celebrate her. The older, wiser me would go back to tell the young new Mum me exactly this today.

CATCH YOURSELF in the now. Be present to the sweetness and stillness of every moment, chaotic, wild and wonderful. Simply feel your feet on ground beneath you and become the witness to the sensations and flow of your breath. Inhale. Exhale. Repeat.

Affirm and say…

I AM AMAZING.

I AM LOVED, HELD AND SUPPORTED.

I AM AN INCREDIBLE MOTHER.

I AM ENOUGH JUST AS I AM.

And remember the great mothering Mantra, this too shall pass.

BIO

Laura is a Mother, Lover, Seeker and Yogini. She wears lycra as part her living!  She is SAMA Studio’s Founder and Principal teacher,  facilitating Yoga classes, retreats, workshops and Yoga Teacher Training. Find and follow her on the below links or catch her teaching at Ekam Yoga Festival this year:

https://www.facebook.com/samastudio.yoga.healing/

https://www.instagram.com/samastudio_yoga_healing/

http://samastudio.com.au/

First introduced to Yoga around 10 years of age and has fond childhood memories of chanting the Gayatri Mantra, meditating, gazing at paintings of Hindu deities and playfully hanging upside down.

By 2007 Laura was a regular student of Yoga. In 2008 her interest in Buddhist philosophy and mindfulness practices led her to taking vows with HH 14th Dalai Lama. Teaching Yoga has been her full-time profession since 2013. She is a Yoga Australia Level 2 registered teacher.

Laura’s motivation to share the gifts the practice brings with others is in service to cultivating and strengthening a greater sense of Kula –Community of Heart. Having experienced first-hand the support a Yoga practice offers in times of trauma, illness and injury, Laura hopes to inspire and connect students to the wisdom and intelligence of their own bodies moving. To feel and know the resiliency and courage of one’s own Spirit.

Known for helping students connect to the intelligence of alignment, she progressively builds students to meet their edges – be it in a flow, alignment or restoration class. She shares in a fun and light-hearted fashion, without skipping the particulars, weaving mythological storytelling and philosophy throughout.

Taking time to nurture your own development isn't selfish.  The well-being of mothers impacts the well-being of children and families in powerful and far reaching ways. We cannot pour from an empty cup.

Motherhood and stress, understanding your triggers and learning to respond rather than react. In mothering we are faced with screaming kids, tantrums, constant want for your attention, demands of breastfeeding etc. Mindfulness of emotions and getting clear on your values is extremely helpful to identify what is going on first rather than reacting. If we do become reactive to the external triggers/stress one of the ways to help yourself is to change the scenery. 

Karen Holmes explains it well in relation to Mums.

Mindfulness is probably the most scientifically investigated form of meditation to date, and to put it simply – it involves ‘training our attention’. Through this, we learn to focus on those things that are most useful and most helpful in our lives, allowing us to live more consciously and fully.

Given that a lot of mothering is done in automatic pilot mode, where we are literally multi-tasking the day away, living more mindfully can help us get on top of negative or worried thinking patterns – those pesky ‘what if…?’ scenarios.

A simple and quick mindfulness meditation:

Sit comfortably, preferably with your back firmly against a chair.

Place your feet on the floor and connect or root yourself with the floor.

Close your eyes, make sure your jaw is soft, and drop your chin a little.

Feel your breath and notice your belly rising and falling.

When you feel your thoughts wandering, simply notice this and return to the breath.

When you’re ready, lift your chin and open your eyes.

Bring your awareness slowly back to your surroundings.

Notice how you feel.

“Mindfulness is simply being aware of what is happening right now without wishing it were different; enjoying the pleasant without holding on when it changes (which it will); being with the unpleasant without fearing it will always be this way (which it won’t).” 

– James Baraz

"When we stay in the present, we make wiser choices and take things less personally."

- Saki Santorelli

“There could not be a better time to learn mindfulness than during pregnancy and early motherhood. For one thing, this is a time when most people have a strong motivation to become the best person they can be in a relatively short period of time. When you realize the full enormity of the responsibility you have taken on by becoming a mom, the primary source of care for another whole human being, not to mention one that you love more than you thought you could ever love, there is a really high level of motivation to try your best to get yourself into the best mental and emotional shape possible. I've talked to so many pregnant women who have for the first time in their lives encountered within themselves a deep and very sweet drive to learn new ways of being-quick! They don't want to pass on negative patterns to their child, and want to do everything possible to transmit a healthy foundation for the rest of their child's life.

Also, this is a great time to learn mindfulness because you are already open and somewhat vulnerable. The downside of this can be feeling off-balance or a little exposed, needing more help from others than usual and being at the mercy of your body's functions and your baby's needs. The upside is that this state of being provides a sort of malleability-some of your defenses are down, you may be feeling more sensitive than usual, and this is a great time to learn new skills! It makes you open-minded in a way that perhaps you are not when you've got everything under control. Since mindfulness has a lot to do with being in touch with the sensations in your body, and being aware, new moms are in a prime state to learn it! In fact, pregnancy and early motherhood, nursing and sleep disturbance, weight gain and weight loss-these all in some way force you to be in your body. For those of us who live most of our lives above our necks, this can actually be a great blessing.

Let me tell you a bit more about how mindfulness transformed my experience of motherhood!

Several years ago, as I struggled with postpartum depression and anxiety, I began to read about mindfulness.

Of course! I thought, I just need to be more mindful! Thank goodness I read this book! 

And then I tried to be mindful.

Without any of the meditating….

I didn’t want to waste my precious time sitting on a cushion doing nothing! I mean, I had all this parenting I had to do! 

But I realized that mindfulness didn’t work if I just read about it and liked the idea of it.

Once I started meditating... 

... my life started to change.

I discovered a peace and stillness at the core of my busy life.

I smiled more. I laughed more. 

 I found a new way of being and doing and mothering.

I realized I could respond much more skillfully to my children ~ even when they were driving me crazy!

I learned to be kind and compassionate to myself.

I knew that mindfulness had transformed me as a mother.

I knew I should start teaching this to others.” By Cassandra Vieten

Over the coming weeks we will share ways to practise mindfulness no matter what stage of motherhood you are at. (Pregnant, Breastfeeding, Postpartum, menopausal- we all deserve a bit of time out...) These practises should be short and not impact upon your day and be an extra chore to do...